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Current Music:Yui : Rolling Days
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Subject:Songs of Anime Series Vol 4. Yui : Rolling Days, Bleach Opening 5
Time:01:17 am
Current Mood:soresore

Well I just spent the day rearanging the bedroom and scrubbing it and the half bath. Now I'm waiting for my blankets to dry so I can go to bed and rest my poor tired body. We played Rock Band earlier and I realized how much I love music and how much I would loved to do english covers of my favorite Anime songs. Of course no one would want to hear those songs sung by my bad voice, no matter how much fun I had singing them. So I will just have to get by with my Songs of Anime Series and let you adjust the lyrics in your own heads.

I adore the smell of incense. With that said on to the song.

Yui : Rolling Days, Bleach Opening 5Collapse )

Ok that's all for now. I think the blankets are done and my f'in back is killing me. I'm going to take some pain meds and hobble off to bed. Night all! Laters! Savvy?

-Aislin
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Current Music:Aqualung on my head Ipod
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Subject:Kittehs, Sushi, and Sake
Time:11:04 am
Current Mood:thoughtfulthoughtful

Well all of you who that live in the Indy area, how’d you like the condo bonfire yesterday? Made me want barbeque, not really, but yeah.

 

Yesterday was boring there isn’t active work for me anymore I guess so I’m back to being utterly bored at work. Crappy to say the least, but I can deal. I get to catch up on my reading and how much weight I gained since starting this job. I need to invest in a treadmill.

 

Yesterday I got a major craving for sushi. Brett said that we could go to the Oriental Buffet if he can look through Comic Carnival afterwards. I agreed and off we went for dinner. The buffet had a ton of stuff. No miso soup like Tokyo Buffet, but having Sake made up for that. I stuffed myself with yummy food and got a little buzzed on hot sake. Then we skittered over to Comic Carnival to look at all the neat stuff. I bought a How to Draw Anime book and a Naruto Jutsu Power energy drink. I had it today it was good, but I don’t feel like I can do any Jutsus. *shrugs*  

 

I got home to find that my phone company decided that they would send me my bill separately. Fun. That killed what little buzz I had. I had to take care of that today.

 

I’m reading a book called Dewey. It’s about a cat that was abandoned at a library as a kitten, and how it touched a town’s hearts. There are fun stories about the cat in there, but also way too much history about the town and the author. I just want to know about the cat. I’m just weird like that. I’m reading the story because it’s supposed to be about a cat, not because I want to learn about a town or the author’s life and history. Seriously, just the cat. From Bagdad With Love was a good animal book. It was pretty good at sticking to talking about the dog. So I recommend that one. But it has some hard to swallow moments to it. Be warned.

 

We are hanging out with J and Renee tonight, so we are all excited about that. It should be loads of fun. *yawn* If I can stay awake long enough. LOL! I want a nap. What’s new? I always do.

 

Brett and I might be hooking up our big freezer soon and buying some meat from the local butcher. I’ve been thinking of that for some time, but of course Coast to Coast convinced him it was time. LOL! Coast to Coast is really not good for his worrying. I’m just glad I won’t have to play the price game with meat.

 

Brett wants to go look at that Cape Cod style house I told him about. There isn’t a lot of room to expand the property, but it looks so cute from the outside and the price is right. I’m just excited that he wants to see a house. I would have to get all new appliances. Which that good and bad. Good, because I would have the ones I want and they should last a while, bad because I would have to come up off the money for that. There’s about $2,000 down the drain. Well something to negotiate with at least. It has a septic system, but city water. Weird I know, no sulfur water, but still has to watch usage. The area is part of a septic elimination program, so we might have help if we want to hook up to city sewer. You pay for it anyway when you pay for city water. It has 4 bedrooms and 1 and a half baths. Just fine for us right now. There is a unfinished basement but it may be able to be finished. There is a walk up attic. If it’s set up like I think it is, then I may use that as my sacred space. It has 2, 2 car garages. One attached to the house, WOOT, and one detached with a workshop. That should be a good start for a kennel. There is just enough room for Katelin, so that’s good. Did I mention the outside looked cute? I sure hope the inside is as cute an inviting as the outside. I’m just waiting for the go ahead from Brett to set up the appointment. If we don’t like this place, we have more options, but for the price, set up, and the look of it. This one might be it for us. *fingers crossed* I want a cute home. I know that’s silly, but I do.

 

Well that’s all for now. Looks like I have more envelope stuffing to do. Laters! Savvy?

 

-Aislin

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Current Music:Spiderwebs: No Doubt
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Subject:Tick Tick Tick Tick
Time:10:17 am
Current Mood:okayokay

*sigh* Well we can’t afford to buy the place we currently live at. It sucks, I really like the place. But, it’s just not in the cards. Plus you can’t have a boarding kennel right across the street from an already established one. You are just asking yourself to fail. So I talked to my agent and revised what we are looking for. Now we are looking for a place to have a kennel with just enough room for Katelin. We already have some good options, and hopefully my agent will find more. We just haven’t found the right place yet. That’s very frustrating. Mainly because I’m ready to start a family with Brett and we aren’t at our goal yet. I know that sound really weird coming from me, but it’s true. Brett says we have plenty of time, but of course like on everything, I’m always in such a rush.

 

Plus I feel we are getting closer to our goal. I know we could make a kennel work. With my animal knowledge and experience, and Brett’s gentle hand and ability to learn quickly, we will make a good team and do just fine. Plus a kennel is more profitable than a boarding stable. But we could work up to adding that in the future too.

 

Brett’s doing great now. He’s eating regularly again. He seems to be able to keep a good mood. He’s getting more sleep on his own, and cares more about himself. He’s quite positive too. I’m glad he’s doing well and I hope it keeps up.

 

I’m also glad he thought of the kennel thing too. In the past I thought about it, but after my Petco experience, I was turned off by it because of bitchy owners. But what Brett suggested has got me rethinking it. It seems almost the perfect set up for us. We love animals especially dogs. We are happy around them and if we own the business we have complete say in how it’s run and how to deal with customers. Plus we would both be there for any kids we have. They would never say that we are never there and they never see us because as they grow up they can be right there with us, caring for the dogs. Brett and I would both be doing something that we love to do, so that would help us a lot. I really think it would work out well for us.

 

The weather was nice for a couple of days though it did bring tornados to Indiana, but now it’s going to get cold again. That’s just not fair. Spring should be coming, not teasing us and retreating. *shakes fist at spring*

 

Brett and I are hanging out with J and Renee Friday. I’m really looking forward to that. I might even drink. *shrugs* I don’t know. Depends if I feel it or not. But with or without, it’s sure to be a lot of fun.

 

It looks like the worm problem at work may be resolved. That’s good, maybe we can actually start getting work done again, without so many interruptions.

 

Well I think that’s all for now. I will post again when I have more updates. Laters! Savvy?

 

-Aislin

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Current Music:Celtic Woman
Current Location:Home on my compy
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Subject:And life goes on.
Time:11:04 pm
Current Mood:sleepysleepy
Well it’s time again for the latest installment of Aislin’s boring life. To me, I guess it isn’t boring, but to you it most likely is. So here it is, prepared to be bored.

Well my poor Brett has been through hell. His new meds have not been kind. The kittehs and I have been doing our best to help him through. I just hope he feels better soon.

I keep having dreams about seeing my grandpa. I can’t remember what he tells me, but it all has meaning. I wake up and cry, because I miss him so. He isn’t following grandma anymore. She’s sad that she couldn’t see him when he was following her around. But I guess there was a reason he didn’t show himself to her. Maybe he is visiting me in my dreams. It would be nice to think so at least.

Work is still boring. We have a worm in the network. It stopped a whole day of work yesterday. They said it was gone today, but up it popped. It’s frustrating as hell.

The weather is getting warmer, so that is good. The bad news is that we will need to get out and walk all 9 acres and pick up all the sticks, branches, and debris that have found their way on our grounds over the winter. Well I guess it can be written off as a good workout.

Brett and I are starting spring cleaning tomorrow. We are determined to make this house livable. They say that a clean house makes one happy. Not really sure about that, but we’ll give it a try. Plus, we offered for my grandma to come down and stay with us whenever she likes. We want my grandparents on my dad’s side to come and visit to. So we can’t have our house looking like a disaster area when they are hear. It’s embarrassing. Hugely so, and I feel bad when my parent’s Brett’s parent’s or our friends come over and see our mess. Our Christmas tree is still up for goddess sake!

We are trying a money drawing candle. It’s supposed to draw the money for your wants and needs, not make you rich. That’s fine with me I just want enough for a farm, and to support a family with said farm. Or a farm and dog kennel, so Brett can work at home with me.

I’m still waiting to see if we can afford this house. I’ve grown use to it. I blessed it the other day, and it’s starting to feel like home. This house works for us the way it is and we can adjust it to make it even better. If the grooming/boarding place across the street from us moves, then we can start a place up here and not worry about moving. My agent needs to get back with me soon. I don’t want to get attached to this place if we can’t keep it, but it’s getting hard not to.

Now to go play rock band. Laters! Savvy?

-Aislin
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Subject:Ways to make me get off my butt and get a joint checking account with my husband.
Time:02:05 pm
Current Mood:annoyedannoyed
I know the title may confuse you, but soon all will become clear.

Let me count the ways.

1. Mom constantly pestering me about what to do with my money (Annoying, but dealwithable)

2. Dad asking about why I'm doing with my money (Uncomfortable and a little suspicious)

3. Mom cornering me and telling me she doesn't like what I'm doing with my money and she got on my account through my dad's name on it and saw my transaction history. (Very annoying, though not at the front of my mind because it's slipped in with another problem my mom wanted to but in on)

4. Hearing from my mother in law that my mom not only viewed my account, but went and got my dad to look at it, and agreeing with me that it's not my parent's business what I do with my money. (Ok, that just pisses me off. I have no debt and more money than my parents and hell of a lot better with managing my money than my mom. It makes me wonder what steps she will take next. Pull my money out of my account to keep me from using it wrong? Neither of my checking accounts or my savings account is safe from my mom. So on Saturday Brett and I are trekking down to the bank and getting joint accounts. Now I know why Nikki changed backs. She knew mom would do this to her.)

Yeah I'm a little annoyed. She caught me off guard and was able to convince me to do something in a way I never would have left up to me. I'm ashamed of that, but you live and learn and the damage is done. I can only move on from here. I really need to stop talking about my home life with her. I need to find a sounding board when I just need to let things out, that don’t try to convince me to take care of things in a totally wrong way. *sigh* My mom knows how to hit me and manipulate me when I'm at my weakest. I love her, but sometimes she really pisses me off. Runs in the family. LOL!

So now in other news. I'm cold as hell. I wish it would warm up. They say it will later in the week, but it will be rainy too. *blech* I'm eagerly awaiting my gift from Tokyo Cowgirl. She got me a charm from a temple and is going to send it to me from Japan. I'm so excited. Also I found a place in Terre Haute Indiana that sells tons of different types of incense for cheap online. It's called Herbs, Heirlooms, and Homebrews Too. It's a great place you should all check it out.

Well I'm sitting here freezing, wondering what to make for dinner and remembering the dishes need to be done tonight. But in the background of my head I'm thinking how I would like to slip into my warm bed with my cats as soon as I get home. Yep I'm tired, what's new. Well I better go back to being productive. Laters! Savvy?

-Aislin
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Current Music:Smashing Pumpkins : Today
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Subject:Bored by the chore, of saving face.
Time:03:07 pm
Current Mood:okayokay
So I'm back at work and once again, pull in 500 different directions and bored at the same time. I don't understand it either. All I know is one of the projects I have to be working on while doing all my front desk stuff, has a tendency to put me asleep. So I have to work a bit on it then skip over to something else to keep myself awake. I wish so much I could work from home. I wouldn't have to get up till it's about time for work. Giving myself just enough time to take care of the animals before plunking myself in front of the old compy and getting to work, while animal planet is on in the background. I wouldn't have to get dressed and the animals could take turns laying on my lap. *sigh* If only. I don't think it's going to happen though. Not unless some wonder job falls out of the sky, or if work takes pity on me and says I can work at least part time at home. Oh, that would be a joy. Of course having horses would be a at home job, but I don't know when that's going to happen though.

Rock Band has been Brett and I's outlet to let go of the day. His Xbox is messing up again, so we may have to spend the money to upgrade.

The farm thing is still up in the air. Hopefully I will know more soon. My urge to push on is ever-present. I'm doing better though, so that's good.

I have a Japanese Peace Lilly now. The cats seem to be leaving it alone. Let’s hope that keeps up. It's pretty low maintaince I just put a aqua globe in it, and check every once and a while to see if I need to fill it.

I need to clean up the house some. We have friends coming over Friday. It will be good to hang out with friends.

I found out one thing though. If you take a week off of work, everything there goes to hell in a hand basket, and it will take you weeks to straiten it back out. Also you will find your pens missing. Want to tick me off at work, then steal my pens. No one is safe then.

I actually banned someone from my desk for that. Needless to say I'm a little perturbed.

I've found since moving I've gotten out of my flow of things that kept me not hating life so much. I stopped watching anime almost all together. Maybe that has more to do with Cat Girl Nuku Nuku being boring repetitive and lacking a good storyline. I need to get some good anime going through my life again. Also I've let this blog go unattended. That just won't do. I love typing my blog.

The ghost bells just went off at work, that reminds me of something I wanted to talk about. First though the ghost bells. We have a door bell for the front door, that use to be for the back, well it has the normal ding dong and nothing else. No other bell setting, but yet out of the blue it will play a different ring, that is not an option on that system. It rings without anyone pushing the button. It's creepy and people think that a ghost that haunts work sets off that ring from time to time.

That brings me to what I was reminded. My mom called me today. My grandma and some of the Texas crew came down to see mom and dad. Well the whole time they were there. Bradley was going nuts seeing things and barking at nothing. He was whacked out seriously. He stopped as soon as they left. It took mom until today to figure it out. Bradley was seeing grandpa. Bradley could always see the departed. He would bark at Murphy, the ghost at the old house from time to time. So we aren't surprised that he could see grandpa, and I'm not surprised that grandpa is still around. He's making sure grandma is going to be ok without him. I doubt he will leave until he's sure she will be just fine. Poor Bradley was probably so confused. He didn't know why grandpa was in that state, he only knew him as someone living. That kind of reaffirms something I experienced after we went back to grandma's house after the viewing. I was sitting on the couch trying to collect my thoughts, feeling utterly overwhelmed and lost, then out of no where in this swelteringly warm house my upper arms get cold. It wasn't a icy cold, but it was very noticeable. I thought after a moment that it could be grandpa touching me. But I figured that more than likely I was just imagining it. But it was right on my upper arms where he use to grab me before and after a hug to say goodbye. I now know that it was him saying goodbye to me. I am thankful for that. I couldn't go up to the casket the day of the viewing, I just couldn't say goodbye. But the next day I could. Leave it to grandpa to be able to tell I couldn't let go and he give me the reassurance I need to do just that. I'm happy I got my one final hug. The hug I needed, that told me he was ok now and I need not worry about him anymore.

Geese this turned out to be a long post and I didn't mean to get all sappy at the end. I just felt it needed sharing. I will try to make the next one shorter and brighter. Laters! Savvy?

-Aislin
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Subject:An ending to a great man's story.
Time:03:56 pm
Now that everything is said and done, I will talk to you about it. I know I haven't been posting much and what I have posted is on the drunken side and I'm sorry for that. Now to let you know what has been happening.

Yesterday we buried my grandfather. Garrel Thomas Bryant. He was 75 years old and died of complications brought on by lympomic cancer. We found out before Thanksgiving that he was sick. He knew it was useless to fight it, but he did for my grandma's sake. I was hard seeing him a once strong a proud man dwindle rapidly down to a hollow husk of what he once was. He tried hard for grandma, but in the end when he realized he had become a burden for her, he let go and went quickly in his sleep.

I feel compelled to tell his story, even if it is a cliff notes version. He was born to a poor family. They moved around from farm to farm getting work where they could. He and his brothers and sisters survived the great depression. He dropped out of high school to help his aunt and uncle on their farm. He grew up and got married. Where he had 2 kids my Uncle Terry and my Aunt Debbie. He divorced his wife when the kids were still young. He proved for his kids working at Western Electric. There he met my grandma Janet. She and him hit it off and soon were married. So thus he gained a mother for his kids and a new daughter, because my grandma was divorced to with my mother as the only child from her marriage. They became a big family. They started a farm together and they still worked at western electric. They saved and penny pinched, knowing how precious money was. In 1984 he finally got his GED. Even after they retired, they started up a lawn mowing business. Which suited grandpa just fine. He loved fixing things, especially mowers, tractors, and bikes. They did that for 12 years before they decided it was time to really retire. So then they started traveling. They often went to visit family in Texas. When he was at home, if he wasn't tinkering with things he was putting together puzzels for playing games on the computer. He was a man of few words at most times, but he was a man of knowledge. He went out of the way to spoil us. He'd even let us put makeup on him and clip on earings and turn his socks into puppets. He was a man of simple wants and simple needs, that never wanted to be a burden to anyone. He put everyone else first. He had an uncanny ability to hide twinkies on his person and make them appear when he had a craving for them. I saw him a few days before he died. He had been not all there and confused, but that day his head was clear and he was happy to see Brett and I. He was so thin and tired. His appetiet was non existent. This saying something for a man who would eat anything that you wouldn't. He loved a good meal. I loved him and still do. Though he is not physically here, I know he's still with us. It was hard seeing him in that casket. It wasn't like him. When ever he slept he snored. And there he was quiet. They put the orange had with rabbit fur in the casket with him. I got him that hat when I worked at Gander Mountain. He loved it and they thought it suiting that it went with him. I was honored to know something I gave him was going to be buried with him. Though I thought they should have shoved some twinkies, chocolate covered peanuts, and a puzzle in with him. It was hard saying goodbye, knowing it was an ending to a great man's story. He was so gentle and kind, but that's how the world works. The best of us don't last as long as the rest of us. It's like a strange cosmic balance that has to be kept. I had Brett there when I said goodbye to my grandpa for the last time. I don't know what I would do if I didn't have Brett there with me. I heard my grandma talk about how she and grandpa were always together. Doing everything together and I sat back and thought that it's like Brett and I. I don't think I could handle it, if I ever lost Brett. He is my other half and I would be lost without him. If we had a farm and kids I would be obligated to continue on, but I would never be the same. Never be happy. Never be complete without him.

But life does go on. Right now the only thing that is pulling me through is the hope of a farm. I may have found the one for us, but I have to wait to see if Brett gives his ok. I hope he does. Well now to drink myself silly. Laters! Savvy?

-Aislin
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Current Music:Anything on America Idol
Current Location:Home
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Subject:Drunk yet again.
Time:08:29 pm
Current Mood:drunkdrunk
Yet the keys are sooo soft. Could be my fucked up senses. Sorry if I spell things wrong. Remember I am drunk and I suck at spelling. So yeah. 3/4 through a bottle of wine and I'm schooling American Idol on easy. I'm not making it up. Simon loves me. I'm eating chicken lazagnia. Yeah I misspelled that, want to fight about it. I hope this post is amusing to you. I blew a .08 on a cheap ass breathalizer. I'm waaaay beyond that. Or I'm an f'ing light weight. Either way I don't drink and drive. It's my policy. If I feel anything at all from the booze I hang up my keys. Well time to finish my food and get back to singing after I pee of course. GO TEAM SEA SLUG! Points if you get that. Laters! Savvy?

-Aislin (The next American Idol: Bow down bitches)

p.s. Best $20 I ever spent.
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Current Music:NICO Touches The Walls: Broken Youth
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Subject:Let go of that bowling ball.
Time:09:38 am
Current Mood:confusedconfused
Well it's snowing again.

For those of you that aren't in Indy, then know this. It snowed 14inchs last week, which locked us in for 2 days and I got to work from home and hurt my back shoveling snow. A investment in a snow blower is in our future. Well we just got dug out of that last snow and the roads were back to normal and then mother nature decided to let us have it again. It's only going to be a few inches, but it's enough to mess up everyone's day and tick us off.

Good news, is that I may not lose my health coverage for depression. That's good, because I found if I miss my 2X daily med. I get really bitchy and want to hurt people. So it's better for all if I can continue to afford my meds.

Well it's offical. The doctors say that my grandpa only has a couple weeks left. I'm going up to see him Saturday and I should be able to drop by and see him after my doctor's appointment Monday. I'm kind of a mix of emotions. I knew it was coming, wanting to admit it or not. I've seen my uncle go through this, and I'm glad my grandpa isn't suffering as much. I feel so sorry for my grandma. I can't even imagine what losing a spouse feels like. I know it would most likely kill me if I ever lost Brett. I don't know what I'm supposed to feel. My meds are helping me keep in control though. I cried silently in Brett's arms when I found out that it was all over but the shouting as Mom put it. I knew I had people I could talk to. One of which is my Mother in law. She has been a great support to me though all of this. Concidering the time I was limited on my options and I just wanted to get my mind off of it. So I put in a call to Tokyo Cowgirl. It's been great having her a phone call away. She's great to talk to. What I didn't expect was for me to break down first thing on the phone call. I knew she would understand and be able to get my mind off of things. I just feel sorry for her having to hear me blubbering on the phone first off. But she helped me greatly and I'm really appreciative. Between her an my crazy kitten that seems to know when I'm feeling down, I was able to pull myself together again. I slept through the night ok. I feel asleep to The Princess Bride and woke up when Unforgiven came on, only to find Rory watching it intently. Who knew she was a Clint Eastwood fan, or is it she just likes westerns. Either was she takes after me alright. I'm doing better. I really am. But I won't be 100% for awhile and I think everyone will understand that.

We can't afford the place in Greenfield, but there is a place closer to home we can. So when all this blasted snow goes away I'll go see it and see if it will fit what we need. I think it will.

Well I need to get back to work. Laters! Savvy?

-Aislin
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Current Music:NCIS in the background
Current Location:Homey home
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Subject:Back with plenty of nose bites.
Time:05:29 pm
I've been so busy and had no motivation, so I haven't been able to write much. Work is uber hecktic. They are hiring more people since they decided to move all physical work up to our office. The smartest thing they did in eons. I've come to terms with the fact that Brett and I can't afford where we are now. There are other options available so we aren't screwed. Like a cute little house with and old barn on Mitthoeffer. There is a horse boarding buisness in Greenfield. There are also a couple places in Franklin. I would rather move to Franklin if I can't get something by my stomping grounds. But that place in Greenfield is really temping. It's already fully working so I can dive right in. The only draw back other than convincing a bank that it makes enough money, is that I have a huge distaste for Greenfield. Why, you might ask, it's because I have never met one good person that has come from there. Not one. My sister and I both have horrible ex's from there. And I've known some nasty ass people that came from there too. Right now we have to wait and weigh our options. We are out of debt but we need to build a savings account. No matter how much we have for a down payment, it would be stupid to get a house without having some savings together for an emegancy. Anthem might stop paying for my depression treatment. Why, because out of the blue I'm going to my doc once a month and am on 2 different meds. How lame is that. I would have to go off of one of my meds, the one that keeps me motivated, if they cut my insureance for it. Asshats. Well we are trucking on. Time will tell. Well I'm going to go back to drinking and watching NCIS I love Gibbs and I wish I was Abby. Laters! Savvy?

-Aislin
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